Don't be shellfish...
Tyler Chatwood*continued his red hot play last night pitching seven innings, surrendering just six hits, two runs, and walking none while striking out 11 Brewers for his seventh win. He also went 2-for-2 at the plate with 2 RBI because apparently he is Tyler the Run Creator now. How about that headline, you guys? I woke up in the middle of the night and saw it in bright lights. And as much as I kept telling myself it was really, really bad — sometimes these things are too bad to be denied. Back to Tyler Chatwood. Hello there, strikeouts! Have we met? You’re just visiting for the weekend? Oh, that’s too bad. The Ks may be a bit fluky and that Milwaukee line up is inspiring fear in no one these days, but Chatwood’s success over his past few starts can’t be ignored. He lowered his ERA to 2.48 and has allowed 2 ER or fewer in his past four starts. He has also managed to notch three wins in those four starts, with the tough luck loss coming after pitching 8.0 innings of one-run ball. He is a great option on the road and is at criminally under 10% owned in RCL. I’d absolutely grab him for his start in Atlanta next week if you need starting pitching help. He cannot be stopped right now! I better go knock on Chat-wood.
Here’s what else happened in fantasy baseball last night:
Randall Delgado*9.0, 3 hits, 0 ER, 1 BB, 3 K. His first complete game and his first shutout! Delgado even had a hand in helping his own cause going 2-for-3 at the dish with a run scored. Grey and Stream-O-Nator told us to BUY this start, and that’s why we read Razzball folks. Delgado’s number 1 fan Adam Duritz tweeted post game, “Hey Pa-dres, let me tell you ’bout Randall, cause mama he’s so hard to handle now! Yes he is!” Okay, I admit, I forced that Counting Crows lyric pretty badly, but Randall has been every bit as hard to handle lately as Duritz’ nasty mop of hair.
Aaron Hill 2-for-2, 2 RBI, left game with a strained hamstring. Cliff Pennington will fill in for Aaron in the interim. At this point, Hill could return to hit 12 HRs, steal 10 bases and send me cake and chocolates with my face etched into it with gold sugar flakes and he’d still be a pretty big disappointment in my mind. I will take the free candy though.
Cody Ross 2-for-5, 2 RBI and his 6th HR. Grey and the HitterTron are all over Ross and told you to*BUY. With their powers combined, it makes for one hairy robot.
Paul Goldschmidt 0-for-5 with 3 K. Goldy, how you gonna do me like that?! The ultimate ticker tease to end all ticker teases! The D-Backs scored 9 runs on 17 hits but poor, poor Paulie couldn’t even reach base. If you need me, I’ll be in my room, slamming my head against my Paul Goldschmidt fathead.
Giancarlo Stanton 2-for-2, 12th HR. Had he not walked twice, I’m convinced he would have had 3 home runs. I have been trying to buy “Don’t Call Me Mike” Stanton all season long and the price just does not go down. Giancarlo owners, why won’t you give up on him!? Regardless, I think 15 HRs the rest of the way is not out of the realm of magical Marlins possibility for G-Carlo. Especially as Miami beefs up their line up a bit with their super prospects. Just give him a bat and watch what happens.
Steve Cishek 1.0 IP, 2 hits, 2 K and his 21st save. Steve’s name is one that keeps coming up in trade talks, and with good reason, he’s had like 15 saves in a month. Grey told you to BUY*Ryan Webb in case this happens, but*A.J. Ramos threw 1.0 inning with 3 K and has pitched well all year, so best to keep an eye on both while you still have both your eyes!
Henderson Alvarez 6.0 IP, 2 hits, 0 ER, 5 K and his first win. Much of this can be chalked up to the Pirates anemic offense, who have begun their annual second half implosion from a top team to a team that gets shut out by Miami. It’s every year with these Pirates! Arrrgh! I feel your pain Bucs fans. Still, give Henderson some credit here, he grabbed his first win with Miami which is reason enough for celebration, and he’s now pitched 13 shutout innings in his past two starts. He’s worth a look for his start next Wednesday versus the Mets.
Cole Hamels 7.0 IP, 6 hits, 2 ER, 3 BB, 6 K and his 13th loss. You unlucky bastard. He actually slipped on a banana peel in the dugout after the game and fell in dog poop. Someone tell Michel Young to stop bringing his Pomeranian to the ball park.
Doug Fister 8.0 IP, 3 hits, 0 ER, 6 K and his 9th win. His third win in a row, with a 1.35 ERA in that stretch. I suggested you buy Fister last week with the hope that the best was yet to come and judging by this start it just may be! Three in a row for Dougie; if Cole Hamels had that kind of success — he’d *probably be on the Tigers.
Manny Machado 2-for-4, 2 RBI and his 9th HR. Macho Manny Machado (oh yeaaah!) has been in a killer slump lately, hitting just .227 in July. More concerning is just one double this month, after hitting 27 in the previous three months. I love Machado more than I love my unborn child (Chevy, after the cars), but if you can get top value for him in a redraft league I’d sell him like a Buy it Now Auction on ebay.
Adam Jones 2-for-4, 3 RBI and 2 HR (21 & 22). Adaaaayum you the man, Jonesy! That’s now six homers in his past 12 games. The coaching staff got him with two pies post game, and coincidentally I was eating two pies on my couch at the time. We are the same, me and Adam.
Chris Tillman 7.0 IP, 2 hits 0 ER, 3 BB, 8 K and his 13th win. He is the first Orioles pitcher since Mike Mussina to have at least 13 wins at this point in the season, which is frankly just kind of sad. I don’t know, whenever I see or hear Mike Mussina’s name it just makes me sad.
Juan Lagares 4-for-9, 3 runs, RBI, and 2 SB. Started both games for Eric Young, Jr. in center field and went 3-for-4 in game one of doubleheader. Deeper leaguers note, Lagares should see plenty of regular playing time going forward. He’s batting .500 since the break with 2 homers and 2 steals. He can offer a little of everything and a lot of nothing, which sounds perfect for the Mets outfield. Come back soon, EYJ!
Daniel Murphy 6-for-9, 3 runs, 2 HR (7 & 8) and 5 RBI. Danny is a hot little potato, covered in sour cream and chives right now, you guys.
Ike Davis 1-for-3 with his 6th HR. He’s making it harder and harder to recommend him but he’s still out there in over 70% of RCL leagues and few players have as much power upside as Ike. Quit making me look bad, Davis, and start hitting more dingers!
Jenrry Mejia 7.0 IP, 7 hits, 0 ER, 7 K and his first win. Pretty impressive outing for Jenrry, which I’m guessing is pronounced “On-Ray” because it’s more fun to say. He gets the Marlins next week, so you gotta like that!
Jordan Zimmermann 6.2 IP, 6 hits, 5 ER, 3 BB, 8 K. You still haven’t sold him yet? What are you waiting for!? Still, I’ll take the eight strikeouts. Thankfully, one Zimmerman came through Friday as Ryan Z hit the game winning home run in the second game of the double header. It’s a bad month to be named Zimmerman, but luckily Ryan isn’t letting it get to him. What’s your excuse Jordan?
Matt Harvey 8.0 IP, 5 hits, 0 ER, 7 K. Harvey has made it no secret that he admires Jeter’s “lifestyle.” That makes both of us! Pretty soon Matt will start handing out gift baskets with signed Jeter memorabilia to all his late night female visitors. Hey, it worked for DJ!
Jayson Werth 5-for-7 with a run scored. Werth is hotter than an Anthony Weiner Snapchat, *batting .317 with 5 homers and 10 RBI over the past two weeks. For what its werth, that’s pretty hot.
Jason Heyward 1-for-4, 8th HR. He also had a pretty sick catch in right field where I screamed at my TV for him to be careful. But, alas, he never listens to me.
Mike Minor 7.0 IP, 4 hits, 1 ER, 5 K and his 10th win. Mike has given up 2 ER or fewer in his past four starts and the strikeouts have showed up too, with 24 Ks in that span. Perhaps he made a *pinkie to mouth* “minor” adjustment?
Jose Reyes 3-for-3 with the slam (6) and legs (11). Joe-say is now batting .338 with 4 stolen bases and 2 homers in the past nine games. Batting atop that crazy line up, Reyes could be a top 10 player going forward. Yeah I said it, he’s that good!
Edwin Encarnacion 3-for-4, 2 HR (27 & 28), 5 RBI. Homered twice in the 7th including a grand slam, it was the first time he’d homered twice in an inning so let’s give him a golf clap. His feat inspired his teammates as well and Colby Rasmus went 4-for-5 and Adam Lind hit his 11th HR. I wouldn’t count the Blue Birds out of it yet.
Brett Lawrie 2-for-4 with his 7th HR. Still not 100% owned in RCL. Well, why the heck not!?
Wil Myers 2-for-5, run, RBI as he hit third. The*Rays captured first place, now 1/2 game up with a 61-42 record and they’ve won an incredible 20 of their last 23 games. Again, not going to jump to conclusions but the Rays are the best team in baseball since Myers hit his first home run on June 22. FACT! I’m not saying he’s the savior, but it’s pretty obvious to me the heart of that team is now batting in the heart of that lineup. Rookies win championships! Yogi Berra said that. Or not. Regardless, the Rays took this one easily thanks to Wil “The Thrill” Myers,*James Loney, who went 2-for-5 with a 3-run HR and 4 RBI, and*Jeremy Hellickson, who pitched 6.0 innings, and gave up just 4 hits for his 10th win. These ain’t your daddy’s Devil Rays, ya’ll!
CC Sabathia 5.0 IP, 9 hits, 7 ER, 3 BB, 6 K. Sabathia’s given up 22 ER in 30 IP in July. Boy howdy, that reeks like a burning condom filled with kimchi. He gets his chance to rebound at PetCo next week and hopefully he can put this horrid July behind him. Based on his track record in the final months, CC should be much better. I wouldn’t go out and trade for him or anything, but he should be much better.
Alfonso Soriano 0-for-5, run, RBI. Honestly, what did you expect? Two home runs in an inning? Nah, that’s Edwin’s thing.
Leonys Martin 3-for-3, 2 runs, RBI, and his 20th SB. He’s been in a vicious slump lately and his ownership rate has plummeted as a result, so it was nice to see this from him. Hopefully he can reclaim a spot at the top of the line up if the Rangers are set on keeping Engel Beltre penciled in there. If someone in your league gave up on Leonys, I’d give him another shot.
Ryan Raburn 2-for-6 with the game-winning 3-run HR in the 11th. Royals, you’ve officially been Ra-burned.*Michael Brantley*went 3-for-4 with 2 runs as well as the Injians scored 10 runs on 18 hits, including 3-hit games from*Asdrubal Cabrera*and*Mike Aviles.
James Shields 7.0 IP, 8 hits, ER. 2 BB, 2 K and his 5th win. I’d rather have Wil Myers! Said everyone ever.
David Lough 2-for-3, 2 RBI and his 4th HR. He’s batting .330 with a HR and a SB over the past two week — oh, I’m sorry I almost dozed off for a second there. All this David Lough talk is making me sleepy.
Rickie Weeks 2-for-4 and a run as he led off. It was his third straight game in the lead off spot. This might be worth noting if Rickie wasn’t so terrible. Regardless, I noted it, but it wasn’t worth it.
Norichika Aoki 2-for-4, run, RBI. Nori goes through these crazy streaks. He’s batting .350 with a HR and 3 SB in the past week. That’s A-OK if you ask me. Ryan Braun texted him post game with a sure fire way to hit even more homers and steal even more bases in a single week. But it’s probably best that Nori just ignored that.
Nolan Arenado 2-for-4, 2 runs, RBI. Of course, as soon as I drop him he gets a six game hitting streak going. Sigh. So it goes, Billy Pilgrim.
Wily Peralta 3.2 IP, 10 base runners, 8 runs, 5 ER, 2 K. Grey told you to BUY him. He also told you NOT to start him in this game. Coors Field = Bad. He’s under 40% owned, gets the Cubs next week, and if you take out last night’s start he’d given up just 1 ER in 29.1 IP in July with a 26/10 K/B ratio.
Clayton Kershaw 8.0 IP, 6 hits, 1 ER, 8 K and his 10th win. Just another day at the office for Kersh — or as he likes to call it, “Friday.”
Hanley Ramirez 2-for-4, with the slam (11) and legs (7). HanRam serves up his slam with extremely tender hamstrings. That’s the only way to get the best flavor out of the muscle. Gordon Ramsay taught him that. Carl Crawford*also went 3-for-4 and is batting .424 over the past week.
Yasiel Puig 0-for-4, 3 K. If you haven’t sold him yet, you’re probably stuck with him now. Why do we never learn. He is not Mike Trout. No one is.
Mike Trout*3-for-5 and a 2-run HR, his 17th. Except him. He is Mike Trout. The one of the Catatfish’s prophecies. The One said to bring balance back to the AL West. The one and only. Do not sell him.
Bartolo Colon*6.0 IP, 7 hits, 2 ER, 2 K and his 14th win. If Colon wins 20 games, Billy Beane said dinner’s on him. Luckily, Beane has all that Brad Pitt money or else he’d go broke after the first round of doritos locos tacos.
Felix Hernandez 9.0 IP, 5 hits, 1 ER, 11 K. The King F-Her lost his shutout and the win in the ninth inning after surrendering a run scoring single to Trevor Plouffe. Trevoooooor! F-Her? No, F-Him!
Glen Perkins 1.0 IP, 1 ER, SV. Gave up a home run to Kendrys Morales in the 13th inning, but still managed to capture his 25th save. This is my impression of Rob Lowe in the offseason, if he were the GM of the Twins: “We literally NEED a closer. I would like him to be good. I would like him to throw fast. Hey, GLEN-PERK-INS! You are LIT-TRALLY the PERFECT man for the job.
Matt Cain 7.0 IP, 6 hits, 1 ER, 7 K. This was encouraging. He is a huge risk, but I like Cain’s chances to rebound in the final two months. I wouldn’t trade a top 40 player for him, but if you can get him on the cheap I’d take a chance.
Edwin Jackson 6.2 IP, 4 hits, 2 ER, 2 BB, 5 K. Grey told you to BUY him. Him and the 1.83 July ERA.
Jed Lowrie 3-for-4, 3 RBI and his 8th HR. Let me tell you about the man named Jed. I said in the preseason I thought Lowrie would be a top five shortstop. This goes to show how wrong I can be about this fantasy business sometimes. Feel free to berate me in the comments. So he probably won’t hit 20 homers, and you can criticize me all you want, but you’ll never destroy my and Jed’s friendship, because that’s as solid as Oak(land).
Questions? Problems? Complaints to management? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below, or you can get at me on twitter @dandemanco.
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Tyler Chatwood*continued his red hot play last night pitching seven innings, surrendering just six hits, two runs, and walking none while striking out 11 Brewers for his seventh win. He also went 2-for-2 at the plate with 2 RBI because apparently he is Tyler the Run Creator now. How about that headline, you guys? I woke up in the middle of the night and saw it in bright lights. And as much as I kept telling myself it was really, really bad — sometimes these things are too bad to be denied. Back to Tyler Chatwood. Hello there, strikeouts! Have we met? You’re just visiting for the weekend? Oh, that’s too bad. The Ks may be a bit fluky and that Milwaukee line up is inspiring fear in no one these days, but Chatwood’s success over his past few starts can’t be ignored. He lowered his ERA to 2.48 and has allowed 2 ER or fewer in his past four starts. He has also managed to notch three wins in those four starts, with the tough luck loss coming after pitching 8.0 innings of one-run ball. He is a great option on the road and is at criminally under 10% owned in RCL. I’d absolutely grab him for his start in Atlanta next week if you need starting pitching help. He cannot be stopped right now! I better go knock on Chat-wood.
Here’s what else happened in fantasy baseball last night:
Randall Delgado*9.0, 3 hits, 0 ER, 1 BB, 3 K. His first complete game and his first shutout! Delgado even had a hand in helping his own cause going 2-for-3 at the dish with a run scored. Grey and Stream-O-Nator told us to BUY this start, and that’s why we read Razzball folks. Delgado’s number 1 fan Adam Duritz tweeted post game, “Hey Pa-dres, let me tell you ’bout Randall, cause mama he’s so hard to handle now! Yes he is!” Okay, I admit, I forced that Counting Crows lyric pretty badly, but Randall has been every bit as hard to handle lately as Duritz’ nasty mop of hair.
Aaron Hill 2-for-2, 2 RBI, left game with a strained hamstring. Cliff Pennington will fill in for Aaron in the interim. At this point, Hill could return to hit 12 HRs, steal 10 bases and send me cake and chocolates with my face etched into it with gold sugar flakes and he’d still be a pretty big disappointment in my mind. I will take the free candy though.
Cody Ross 2-for-5, 2 RBI and his 6th HR. Grey and the HitterTron are all over Ross and told you to*BUY. With their powers combined, it makes for one hairy robot.
Paul Goldschmidt 0-for-5 with 3 K. Goldy, how you gonna do me like that?! The ultimate ticker tease to end all ticker teases! The D-Backs scored 9 runs on 17 hits but poor, poor Paulie couldn’t even reach base. If you need me, I’ll be in my room, slamming my head against my Paul Goldschmidt fathead.
Giancarlo Stanton 2-for-2, 12th HR. Had he not walked twice, I’m convinced he would have had 3 home runs. I have been trying to buy “Don’t Call Me Mike” Stanton all season long and the price just does not go down. Giancarlo owners, why won’t you give up on him!? Regardless, I think 15 HRs the rest of the way is not out of the realm of magical Marlins possibility for G-Carlo. Especially as Miami beefs up their line up a bit with their super prospects. Just give him a bat and watch what happens.
Steve Cishek 1.0 IP, 2 hits, 2 K and his 21st save. Steve’s name is one that keeps coming up in trade talks, and with good reason, he’s had like 15 saves in a month. Grey told you to BUY*Ryan Webb in case this happens, but*A.J. Ramos threw 1.0 inning with 3 K and has pitched well all year, so best to keep an eye on both while you still have both your eyes!
Henderson Alvarez 6.0 IP, 2 hits, 0 ER, 5 K and his first win. Much of this can be chalked up to the Pirates anemic offense, who have begun their annual second half implosion from a top team to a team that gets shut out by Miami. It’s every year with these Pirates! Arrrgh! I feel your pain Bucs fans. Still, give Henderson some credit here, he grabbed his first win with Miami which is reason enough for celebration, and he’s now pitched 13 shutout innings in his past two starts. He’s worth a look for his start next Wednesday versus the Mets.
Cole Hamels 7.0 IP, 6 hits, 2 ER, 3 BB, 6 K and his 13th loss. You unlucky bastard. He actually slipped on a banana peel in the dugout after the game and fell in dog poop. Someone tell Michel Young to stop bringing his Pomeranian to the ball park.
Doug Fister 8.0 IP, 3 hits, 0 ER, 6 K and his 9th win. His third win in a row, with a 1.35 ERA in that stretch. I suggested you buy Fister last week with the hope that the best was yet to come and judging by this start it just may be! Three in a row for Dougie; if Cole Hamels had that kind of success — he’d *probably be on the Tigers.
Manny Machado 2-for-4, 2 RBI and his 9th HR. Macho Manny Machado (oh yeaaah!) has been in a killer slump lately, hitting just .227 in July. More concerning is just one double this month, after hitting 27 in the previous three months. I love Machado more than I love my unborn child (Chevy, after the cars), but if you can get top value for him in a redraft league I’d sell him like a Buy it Now Auction on ebay.
Adam Jones 2-for-4, 3 RBI and 2 HR (21 & 22). Adaaaayum you the man, Jonesy! That’s now six homers in his past 12 games. The coaching staff got him with two pies post game, and coincidentally I was eating two pies on my couch at the time. We are the same, me and Adam.
Chris Tillman 7.0 IP, 2 hits 0 ER, 3 BB, 8 K and his 13th win. He is the first Orioles pitcher since Mike Mussina to have at least 13 wins at this point in the season, which is frankly just kind of sad. I don’t know, whenever I see or hear Mike Mussina’s name it just makes me sad.
Juan Lagares 4-for-9, 3 runs, RBI, and 2 SB. Started both games for Eric Young, Jr. in center field and went 3-for-4 in game one of doubleheader. Deeper leaguers note, Lagares should see plenty of regular playing time going forward. He’s batting .500 since the break with 2 homers and 2 steals. He can offer a little of everything and a lot of nothing, which sounds perfect for the Mets outfield. Come back soon, EYJ!
Daniel Murphy 6-for-9, 3 runs, 2 HR (7 & 8) and 5 RBI. Danny is a hot little potato, covered in sour cream and chives right now, you guys.
Ike Davis 1-for-3 with his 6th HR. He’s making it harder and harder to recommend him but he’s still out there in over 70% of RCL leagues and few players have as much power upside as Ike. Quit making me look bad, Davis, and start hitting more dingers!
Jenrry Mejia 7.0 IP, 7 hits, 0 ER, 7 K and his first win. Pretty impressive outing for Jenrry, which I’m guessing is pronounced “On-Ray” because it’s more fun to say. He gets the Marlins next week, so you gotta like that!
Jordan Zimmermann 6.2 IP, 6 hits, 5 ER, 3 BB, 8 K. You still haven’t sold him yet? What are you waiting for!? Still, I’ll take the eight strikeouts. Thankfully, one Zimmerman came through Friday as Ryan Z hit the game winning home run in the second game of the double header. It’s a bad month to be named Zimmerman, but luckily Ryan isn’t letting it get to him. What’s your excuse Jordan?
Matt Harvey 8.0 IP, 5 hits, 0 ER, 7 K. Harvey has made it no secret that he admires Jeter’s “lifestyle.” That makes both of us! Pretty soon Matt will start handing out gift baskets with signed Jeter memorabilia to all his late night female visitors. Hey, it worked for DJ!
Jayson Werth 5-for-7 with a run scored. Werth is hotter than an Anthony Weiner Snapchat, *batting .317 with 5 homers and 10 RBI over the past two weeks. For what its werth, that’s pretty hot.
Jason Heyward 1-for-4, 8th HR. He also had a pretty sick catch in right field where I screamed at my TV for him to be careful. But, alas, he never listens to me.
Mike Minor 7.0 IP, 4 hits, 1 ER, 5 K and his 10th win. Mike has given up 2 ER or fewer in his past four starts and the strikeouts have showed up too, with 24 Ks in that span. Perhaps he made a *pinkie to mouth* “minor” adjustment?
Jose Reyes 3-for-3 with the slam (6) and legs (11). Joe-say is now batting .338 with 4 stolen bases and 2 homers in the past nine games. Batting atop that crazy line up, Reyes could be a top 10 player going forward. Yeah I said it, he’s that good!
Edwin Encarnacion 3-for-4, 2 HR (27 & 28), 5 RBI. Homered twice in the 7th including a grand slam, it was the first time he’d homered twice in an inning so let’s give him a golf clap. His feat inspired his teammates as well and Colby Rasmus went 4-for-5 and Adam Lind hit his 11th HR. I wouldn’t count the Blue Birds out of it yet.
Brett Lawrie 2-for-4 with his 7th HR. Still not 100% owned in RCL. Well, why the heck not!?
Wil Myers 2-for-5, run, RBI as he hit third. The*Rays captured first place, now 1/2 game up with a 61-42 record and they’ve won an incredible 20 of their last 23 games. Again, not going to jump to conclusions but the Rays are the best team in baseball since Myers hit his first home run on June 22. FACT! I’m not saying he’s the savior, but it’s pretty obvious to me the heart of that team is now batting in the heart of that lineup. Rookies win championships! Yogi Berra said that. Or not. Regardless, the Rays took this one easily thanks to Wil “The Thrill” Myers,*James Loney, who went 2-for-5 with a 3-run HR and 4 RBI, and*Jeremy Hellickson, who pitched 6.0 innings, and gave up just 4 hits for his 10th win. These ain’t your daddy’s Devil Rays, ya’ll!
CC Sabathia 5.0 IP, 9 hits, 7 ER, 3 BB, 6 K. Sabathia’s given up 22 ER in 30 IP in July. Boy howdy, that reeks like a burning condom filled with kimchi. He gets his chance to rebound at PetCo next week and hopefully he can put this horrid July behind him. Based on his track record in the final months, CC should be much better. I wouldn’t go out and trade for him or anything, but he should be much better.
Alfonso Soriano 0-for-5, run, RBI. Honestly, what did you expect? Two home runs in an inning? Nah, that’s Edwin’s thing.
Leonys Martin 3-for-3, 2 runs, RBI, and his 20th SB. He’s been in a vicious slump lately and his ownership rate has plummeted as a result, so it was nice to see this from him. Hopefully he can reclaim a spot at the top of the line up if the Rangers are set on keeping Engel Beltre penciled in there. If someone in your league gave up on Leonys, I’d give him another shot.
Ryan Raburn 2-for-6 with the game-winning 3-run HR in the 11th. Royals, you’ve officially been Ra-burned.*Michael Brantley*went 3-for-4 with 2 runs as well as the Injians scored 10 runs on 18 hits, including 3-hit games from*Asdrubal Cabrera*and*Mike Aviles.
James Shields 7.0 IP, 8 hits, ER. 2 BB, 2 K and his 5th win. I’d rather have Wil Myers! Said everyone ever.
David Lough 2-for-3, 2 RBI and his 4th HR. He’s batting .330 with a HR and a SB over the past two week — oh, I’m sorry I almost dozed off for a second there. All this David Lough talk is making me sleepy.
Rickie Weeks 2-for-4 and a run as he led off. It was his third straight game in the lead off spot. This might be worth noting if Rickie wasn’t so terrible. Regardless, I noted it, but it wasn’t worth it.
Norichika Aoki 2-for-4, run, RBI. Nori goes through these crazy streaks. He’s batting .350 with a HR and 3 SB in the past week. That’s A-OK if you ask me. Ryan Braun texted him post game with a sure fire way to hit even more homers and steal even more bases in a single week. But it’s probably best that Nori just ignored that.
Nolan Arenado 2-for-4, 2 runs, RBI. Of course, as soon as I drop him he gets a six game hitting streak going. Sigh. So it goes, Billy Pilgrim.
Wily Peralta 3.2 IP, 10 base runners, 8 runs, 5 ER, 2 K. Grey told you to BUY him. He also told you NOT to start him in this game. Coors Field = Bad. He’s under 40% owned, gets the Cubs next week, and if you take out last night’s start he’d given up just 1 ER in 29.1 IP in July with a 26/10 K/B ratio.
Clayton Kershaw 8.0 IP, 6 hits, 1 ER, 8 K and his 10th win. Just another day at the office for Kersh — or as he likes to call it, “Friday.”
Hanley Ramirez 2-for-4, with the slam (11) and legs (7). HanRam serves up his slam with extremely tender hamstrings. That’s the only way to get the best flavor out of the muscle. Gordon Ramsay taught him that. Carl Crawford*also went 3-for-4 and is batting .424 over the past week.
Yasiel Puig 0-for-4, 3 K. If you haven’t sold him yet, you’re probably stuck with him now. Why do we never learn. He is not Mike Trout. No one is.
Mike Trout*3-for-5 and a 2-run HR, his 17th. Except him. He is Mike Trout. The one of the Catatfish’s prophecies. The One said to bring balance back to the AL West. The one and only. Do not sell him.
Bartolo Colon*6.0 IP, 7 hits, 2 ER, 2 K and his 14th win. If Colon wins 20 games, Billy Beane said dinner’s on him. Luckily, Beane has all that Brad Pitt money or else he’d go broke after the first round of doritos locos tacos.
Felix Hernandez 9.0 IP, 5 hits, 1 ER, 11 K. The King F-Her lost his shutout and the win in the ninth inning after surrendering a run scoring single to Trevor Plouffe. Trevoooooor! F-Her? No, F-Him!
Glen Perkins 1.0 IP, 1 ER, SV. Gave up a home run to Kendrys Morales in the 13th inning, but still managed to capture his 25th save. This is my impression of Rob Lowe in the offseason, if he were the GM of the Twins: “We literally NEED a closer. I would like him to be good. I would like him to throw fast. Hey, GLEN-PERK-INS! You are LIT-TRALLY the PERFECT man for the job.
Matt Cain 7.0 IP, 6 hits, 1 ER, 7 K. This was encouraging. He is a huge risk, but I like Cain’s chances to rebound in the final two months. I wouldn’t trade a top 40 player for him, but if you can get him on the cheap I’d take a chance.
Edwin Jackson 6.2 IP, 4 hits, 2 ER, 2 BB, 5 K. Grey told you to BUY him. Him and the 1.83 July ERA.
Jed Lowrie 3-for-4, 3 RBI and his 8th HR. Let me tell you about the man named Jed. I said in the preseason I thought Lowrie would be a top five shortstop. This goes to show how wrong I can be about this fantasy business sometimes. Feel free to berate me in the comments. So he probably won’t hit 20 homers, and you can criticize me all you want, but you’ll never destroy my and Jed’s friendship, because that’s as solid as Oak(land).
Questions? Problems? Complaints to management? Advice, small gifts or large bribes? Please leave it in the comments below, or you can get at me on twitter @dandemanco.
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